


Hands

by nooky



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: M/M, Sad, Violence, happyish ending, i cried, please don't read if you don't want to be sad, sorry - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-04-21
Updated: 2014-04-21
Packaged: 2018-01-20 07:52:42
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,479
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1502591
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nooky/pseuds/nooky
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>His hands just did things. Bad things. But it wasn't Louis, it was Her. </p><p>Harry fucked up his relationship with Louis once, and he was determined to fix it in every way possible. But that one night won't stray from his mind; it digs deep into his memories, haunting his every move. </p><p>And soon it all becomes too much</p>
            </blockquote>





	Hands

**Author's Note:**

> Okay, so I just want you to know that I am the same person who posted this on onedirectionfanfiction (Life_story72) along with Three Years, One and The Same, and What's That Ribbon For. I just like this website a lot better so...

"Uh uh, oh yeah, yes-"

Harry's head snapped up to meet the gaze of a stranger. Her blue eyes glazed over at the rough pounding he was inflicting to a certain area of her body.

What?

No. This can't be. He was positive this was just a dream, a nightmare. She wasn't real. He wouldn't do that to the only person he's ever truly loved. He couldn't. 

But as her moans got louder, he knew. This was real. He was cheating. 

"Oh fuck yeah," She breathed before he stopped abruptly, earning a strangled cry from the unfamiliar female inhabiting his bed, and currently being fucked senseless. 

"No," He whispered, pulling out completely, erection slowly dissipating as he thought of numerous reasons why he shouldn't let himself feel pleasure. He was hurting the only person whom he cared about. But why?

The memories of earlier flooded through what Harry realized was drunk haziness. 

Louis getting mad over a dare. Harry telling him to fuck off and let him live. Louis storming off after angrily 'breaking up' with the curly haired boy. Harry getting so drunk he couldn't see faces. Then fucking some broad thinking it was Louis. All he really wanted was Louis.

Sometime during his flashback session, the blonde girl must've flipped them over because she was riding him, bouncing up and down on his half hard cock. Her moans of pleasure surfaced eventually, Harry lying helpless under her.

But the next thing he knew, Harry watched the door open and a certain feather haired, blue eyed, tattooed man entered, completely taken off guard by the scene splayed out before him. 

Harry couldn't do anything but watch as the older man's face turned from surprised, to hurt, to completely broken. But as soon as his gaze caught Harry's confused one, it turned black with anger. 

Harry watched as Louis swiveled around and slammed the door shut with the harshest look he'd ever witnessed. He'd done it. He hurt the only person who's ever really cared. Who he's ever really cared about. And with what? Fucking some blonde dike. 

Mustering up as much strength he had from the booze, Harry violently pushed the dumb girl off of his now soft dick and shoved her to the side, making her fall off of the bed. 

She looked scared to bits as she saw the look on Harry's face. He felt a surge of guilt that was soon replaced by anger again as he pointed his finger at her.

"YOU MADE ME DO THIS!" His voice raised octaves higher as he hovered over her. Of course he didn't believe his words, but he didn't want to believe his actions either. "You fucking broad! You think you can just fuck with my head and get a good shag? Huh? Well get the fuck out because that's not how it fucking works!"

The look on her face was one of complete horror as he held his hand up to smack her. He really didn't mean it, but he couldn't help the guilty feeling as Louis popped into his brain again.

Everything after that was a blur. He felt himself being pulled away and held down. His eyes instantly shutting as he let the alcohol take control once again. His brain shut down, but he could hear the faint sobs of a female voice, bringing him back to reality. He turned to see Zayn leading the blubbering woman out of the room and Liam held him to the ground. Niall appeared and helped Liam haul Harry over to the bed.

One thought coursed through the curly haired boy's mind before he blacked out. 

"Where's Louis?" 

-*-

No one asked Harry about the incident, which he was glad about. They all knew it was a rough time for him and Louis. In fact, it had been a week before they finally spoke to each other, and it was simply about work. 

Harry was desperately trying to show Louis his trustworthy side, but Lou wouldn't budge. 

It took another few weeks before something tragically beautiful happened.

It was dark in the Styles/Tomlinson shared flat. Harry was running over his thoughts when he heard the living room television on. Peering out of his room, he saw Louis sat with his head laid back on the couch. 

His curiosity and general attraction to the older man got the better of him, so he carefully stepped out into the living area. 

Soft moans filled the room, and Harry realized Louis was watching porn, pleasuring himself to it. 

It made his heart sink, but aroused him so much as he glanced over the back of the couch. Sure enough, Louis was stroking his cock violently as he glanced occasionally at the television. 

By the look on Lou's face, Harry could tell he was close to release. He'd seen it plenty of times before, and it never ceased to amaze him. The way his blue eyes looked almost navy, and his lips puffed and pouted slightly. The crinkles his nose made when he scrunched his face up, nearing closer with every stroke. 

Harry suddenly reached for the remote and quickly shut off the Telly. Louis fumbled a bit, but regained his composure and groaned when he saw the culprit. His hand never ceased, though, and Harry could tell it was becoming painful for Lou to hold his release.

Subconsciously, Harry gravitated toward Louis' throbbing cock, eyes averting from his face for a split second before dropping to his knees out of habit. 

He finally realized what he was about to do, and slowly backed away from the other boy's member. Louis looked hurt by the gesture, and suddenly stopped stroking his erection. 

Harry could see every emotion Louis was bottling up at that moment, in that state of vulnerability. All of the pain and heartache pulsed from Louis' eyes to Harry's veins within seconds, but the next two words that escaped the blue eyed boy's mouth gave way to any previous doubt.

"Harry, please..." he moaned slightly. Harry's eyes widened at what exactly Louis was suggesting, but he didn't argue. 

Instead, he pulled the older boy to his feet, cock still standing painfully hard, and led him to the main bedroom. 

Sex wasn't something the boys messed around with. Usually they only did it when something emotionally stressful happened and they wanted to show their love. Harry knew he was delivering to this special moment. The passion and love outweighed the lust in his eyes by 100 fold. And he could see it in Lou's eyes, too.

As they helped each other undress, their mouths met in a fiery battle for dominance. Their tongues danced in a way that was natural and beautiful, tasting each other's sweet lips with every swirl.

"I'm so sorry, Lou. I didn't mean it," Harry's words were muffled by kisses and brushes of lips. He couldn't think straight after the nod he received. Louis had forgiven him, and the heat was eliciting moans that vibrated through both of them. 

A few more intimate kisses, and both boys were completely naked, dicks hard and red for each other. 

Harry reached for Louis' cock and stroked it lovingly, only adding more arousal to the situation. 

"Haz. Need you. In me." Louis stuttered out slapping Harry's hand away. Harry nodded and gently pushed him back onto the mattress, using his knees to spread his lover's legs apart. 

"Need to open you up," Harry breathed into Louis' mouth as he leaned in for another kiss. 

After fumbling around for a few seconds, Harry had his fingers coated in lube and slowly entered one into the tight ring of muscles in Lou's bum. A cry of pleasure rocked through Louis and he pushed down into the younger boy's hand. 

All too soon, though, three of Harry's fingers were easily sliding out of his puckered arse, leaving him completely empty. 

"Harry. I need to feel you, babe," Louis' groan floated through the flat. 

Harry coated his cock quickly before plunging into his sort-of ex boyfriend's hole, burying the whole length before pausing. Louis trembled slightly as he adjusted to the size, forcing his eyes shut. A feeling of heat passing through his abdomen gave him the signal to start rocking into Harry's unmoving dick. The pleasure filled his senses as Harry purred his name and stroked his cheek as he started moving.

Harry sighed at the feeling of finally having his Louis back. He closed his eyes tightly to take in the sheer pleasure of Lou's bum slapping against his hips with every thrust. Each growing more powerful. 

But when he re-opened his eyes, his heart sank at the sight. The fucking blonde bimbo filled Harry's sight as he slid into her. 

How can this be happening again? 

The tight wetness was too much for Harry, though, so he didn't stop thrusting. He simply moved his hands to the person's splayed out neck, gripping tightly. His features dark as the blue eyes widened in surprise. 

He grew angrier at the smirk on her face when she realized he was being rough. His hands grew tighter with anger and disappointment. But his eyes never left those blue ones. 

They went from cocky and playful to scared and helpless in a matter of seconds as his hands increased in strength. Choked cries escaped his victim's mouth before they started thrashing violently, grabbing Harry's wrists to stop him.

"Harry! S-Stop. Plea-" they heaved out before Harry stopped the air completely, still chasing his release as the person under him struggled to get away. 

He wouldn't let her though. She messed up his life once, and he wouldn't let it happen again. 

"Haz," The voice faded slightly in one last attempt to cease the violence. It was Harry's turn to widen his eyes. 

That voice.

He loosened his grip a little, trying to hear the voice again. 

"Harry, please. I-it hurts!" The person gasped out.

The pain of the familiar voice was too much for Harry, so he closed his eyes tight and tried to focus on what was happening. 

As the light streamed back into his vision, his heart stopped beating. It wasn't her; the blonde from before. It was Louis. His Louis. Eyes wide with fear and chest heaving. 

All he could think to do was lean down for a kiss, happy that the girl wasn't there anymore, but when he did, realization hit him.

Louis cowered away from his touch, whimpering slightly. At first, Harry was confused. Just a second ago they were making love. But as his eyes trailed down Louis' face, it scanned over the position of his hands. Gripping at Louis' throat, almost cutting off the air completely. 

His hands flew back instantly, letting the older boy go. All of the haze seemed to fade away in that moment. The long bruises that were forming on Lou's neck were the shapes of his bony fingers. He did this. 

Stunned and ashamed, Harry slowly pulled out of Louis with so much regret on his face it was almost scary. 

As soon as Louis was free, he scrambled over the bed, and huddled into a ball in the corner of the room, sobbing loudly.

It took a second for everything to come together in Harry's mind. 

The girl wasn't there. It was Louis. It was Louis he got angry at and it was Louis he came so close to strangling. How could he do such an awful thing and not realize it? 

The green eyed boy climbed off the bed and scooted over toward Louis until Louis shook and curled up away from him even more. The sounds of sobbing clearly filling his senses. 

"No, baby. No. Lou. Louis I'm so sorry, baby. It wasn't- I didn't- you weren't you. You were her. I didn't mean to, please. Don't be afraid of me, I'm so sorry!" Harry cried loudly, dropping his head into his hands and heaving out apologies. His whole being shook with guilt as he peered up again to see Louis silently bawling, his eyes cast down to his feet and hands traveling up to soothe his neck. 

"Babe, please. I won't hurt you! I promise!" Harry reached out again, only to have Louis duck under his arms. "No, please. I-I didn't want to hurt you. I never want to hurt you, Boo. I love you so much. But you turned into her, and I didn't want it to be true. I didn't want to lose you again. I don't know what I was thinking! My hands just- they just did things! I would never hurt you Lou! Never!"

Louis' face scrunched up in anger and confusion, his tears stopping for a split second. "You just did." 

His voice was barely above a whisper, but Harry heard it, and his heart fell into his stomach.

He hurt Louis. He fucked up any chance of getting him back because he fucking hallucinated some bitch from his past. That hurt. So badly.

Harry nodded, looking directly into Louis' eyes in agony. He mumbled a simple "I'm sorry," before scooting away from the quivering boy. 

And so they sat, completely nude, Harry shaking his head repeatedly, mumbling I love you'd and I'm sorry's, and Louis hearing every single one of them. Taking every single one of them to heart. 

He doesn't know how long it was before the words left his mouth, it could've been hours. It sure as hell felt like it. But they did, and it surprised both of them.

"I love you, too," Louis finally muttered, closing his eyes and letting his body go limp after what felt like a lifetime of holding himself. 

Harry's head snapped up, tears dried to his cheeks and face puffy. He stared at Louis' limp body, wondering if he heard that correctly. 

"W-what?" 

"I said I love you, too, Haz. I don't want to, but I do. You hurt me so badly, but I can't not forgive you. And I hate it."

"Boo," Harry cooed, cautiously moving closer. He inched his way over until his thigh touched Louis' muscular one. The older boy didn't flinch, so Harry slowly wrapped his arms around the limp body lying next to him, gently pulling him onto his lap. 

Louis' head rolled back onto Harry's shoulder as he opened his red rimmed eyes. 

The two shared a look. No one who wasn't them could describe that look. It was like an entire conversation. And as Harry cradled the smaller man's being, whispering apologies and promises, and pressing slow kisses to his forehead, and the smaller man sobbed into his chest, there was a silent communication shared. 

Nothing like this would ever happen again. Because as Harry looked down at his Louis, he couldn't imagine life without him. And he would do anything to keep him safe. Even from himself.


End file.
